{"id":9452,"date":"2020-08-03T13:15:07","date_gmt":"2020-08-03T13:15:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/iarpp.net\/?post_type=article&p=9452"},"modified":"2020-08-11T16:29:00","modified_gmt":"2020-08-11T16:29:00","slug":"memorial-tribute-to-philip-bromberg","status":"publish","type":"article","link":"https:\/\/iarpp.net\/thesite\/article\/memorial-tribute-to-philip-bromberg\/","title":{"rendered":"Memorial Tributes to Philip M. Bromberg"},"content":{"rendered":"

Philip M. Bromberg, Ph.D. (1931-2020)
\n\"\"<\/a><\/h2>\n

Philip\u00a0Bromberg, a cornerstone of contemporary psychoanalysis,\u00a0passed away on May 18th at the age of 89, of natural causes. He was a Fellow of the\u00a0American Psychological Association\u00a0and an ABPP Diplomate in\u00a0Clinical Psychology, and\u00a0one of IARPP’s earliest members. He was one of the founders of the Stephen Mitchell Center for Relational Studies; a longtime, esteemed member of the faculties of the NYU Postdoctoral Program in Psychotherapy and Psychoanalysis and the William Alanson White Institute; and a beloved teacher, supervisor, analyst, friend and mentor to many in our community. He was Co-editor Emeritus of\u00a0Contemporary Psychoanalysis<\/em>, and was on the editorial boards of\u00a0Psychoanalytic Dialogues<\/em> and\u00a0Psychoanalytic Inquiry<\/em>. Bromberg was most widely known as the author of\u00a0Standing in the Spaces: Essays on Clinical Process, Trauma and Dissociation (1998)<\/em>,\u00a0Awakening the Dreamer: Clinical Journeys<\/em>\u00a0(2006), and\u00a0The Shadow of the Tsunami: and the Growth of the Relational Mind<\/em>\u00a0(2011). His teaching and publications, especially on the topics of dissociation in normal and less adaptive mental functioning, multiplicity, enactment, trauma, and the process of healing and growth via human relatedness, have influenced generations of clinicians throughout the world. His insights were extraordinary, his writing profound and often poetic.<\/p>\n

The IARPP Bulletin <\/em>asked a number of friends and colleagues to share reminiscences touching on both their personal and professional relationships with Dr. Bromberg.<\/p>\n

Lawrence O. Brown, Ph.D.<\/a> William Alanson White Institute
\n<\/em>Sheldon Itzkowitz, Ph.D., ABPP<\/a> NYU Postdoctoral Program in Psychotherapy & Psychoanalysis
\n<\/em>Jean Petrucelli, Ph.D.<\/a> William Alanson White Institute, NYU Postdoctoral Program in Psychotherapy & Psychoanalysis
\n<\/em>Stuart A. Pizer, Ph.D., ABPP<\/a> Massachusetts Institute for Psychoanalysis
\n<\/em>Maggie Robbins, M.P.S., L.P.<\/a> National Institute for the Psychotherapies
\n<\/em>Donnel Stern, Ph.D.<\/a> William Alanson White Institute<\/em>, NYU Postdoctoral Program in Psychotherapy & Psychoanalysis<\/em><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a> <\/a><\/p>\n

Remembering My Friend Philip<\/h2>\n

Lawrence O. Brown<\/strong>, Ph.D. (USA)<\/p>\n

\"Philip<\/a>

Philip Bromberg & Lawrence O. Brown at Tenzan on Columbus Avenue<\/p><\/div>\n

Writing this remembrance of Philip, my friend \u2013 still<\/em> \u2013 of 44 years, makes the moment of losing him painfully vivid and acute again. We \u201centered politics\u201d in the committees of the William Alanson White Institute (WAWI) as kindred spirits together, we shared office suites for almost 25 years, and we co-led a clinical seminar annually at WAWI for nearly 10 years. We tuna fished together, yakked on the phone and emailed each other lots, had \u201cour table at Tenzan\u201d weekly, pre-seminar time and during the year when we weren\u2019t teaching (see photo), and knew deeply and lovingly how the joy of laughing together was but one rich experience of being connected with each other in our special friendship. Except for within the extraordinarily intimate world that always evolved rapidly between us and the candidates who participated in our clinical seminar, our ongoing dialogue was rarely about psychoanalysis and our psychoanalytic work, and almost always about Life (as \u201cthey\u201d say) from our very personal experiences and perspectives, with wit, and from what we both acknowledged and shared enjoyment in \u2013 that we were two guys from Brooklyn, and an era in Brooklyn the details of which we could reminisce about without end. In fact, having already been in many joint ventures, we occasionally fantasized opening a luncheonette\/soda fountain\/candy store together in Brooklyn, and would howl as we designed and stocked the place in great and easily envisioned detail.<\/p>\n

Our friendship is a treasure for me. Continuing to feel the excitement of learning about clinical process in the midst of living it in the ways that Philip so wonderfully taught and wrote about keeps him close to me. Feeling the impulse still to call him up to share a thought, observation, something funny that I know he\u2019d laugh about keeps him close too. It always took me by surprise when he would tell me that he learned from me until I grasped (again and again) that Philip was that person who was so unusually open and tuned in to the otherness of the Other, and that he was taking something in that was novel or impactful and valuable from my otherness. The psychoanalytic universe has lost a most generous and generative star. I still see Philip\u2019s broad smile, hear Philip\u2019s full-hearted laughter and see his twinkly eyes and can vividly imagine the conversation we\u2019d be having if I could only get a call through.<\/p>\n

Lawrence O. Brown, Ph.D.
\nNew York, NY
\n
\n<\/a>\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Fifteen Minutes<\/h2>\n

Sheldon Itzkowitz<\/strong>, Ph.D. (USA)<\/p>\n

I argue that the source of therapeutic action in psychoanalysis is the interpenetration of affectively alive interpersonal engagement and the shifting self-states that organize the internal object worlds of both patient and analyst . . .<\/em> that, during<\/em> its creation, allows previously unformulated self-state truth to be cognitively and linguistically symbolized through the involved minds of both partners.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 (Bromberg, 2009, p. 356)<\/p>\n

\"Philip<\/a>

Philip Bromberg & Sheldon Itzkowitz<\/p><\/div>\n

On Monday afternoons, for about 12 years, I\u2019d hop into a taxi from my office on the Upper West Side and cross Central Park to Madison Avenue and 79th<\/sup> Street to join my supervision group with Philip Bromberg. I\u2019m compulsively early, so I\u2019d arrive with enough time to have lunch at one of the eateries on Madison Avenue, and do my banking at the Chase branch on the southeast corner of 79th<\/sup> street. I\u2019d occasionally have enough time for a brisk walk and sometimes stop into La Maison Du Chocolat and buy some luscious chocolates for myself or the group. And still I\u2019d get to Philip\u2019s office fifteen minutes early.<\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t mind sitting in the waiting room. It gave me time to think particularly when it was my turn to present. At some point, I no longer remember when, Philip began inviting me into his consulting room early and we\u2019d have time to schmooze. We\u2019d discuss events of the day, politics, restaurants, martinis, families, etc. But most frequently we\u2019d talk about dissociation and patients with extreme dissociative disorders who because of their tragic trauma histories are vulnerable to revealing the dissociative structure of their minds. There were occasions when something personal was troubling me. Of course, Phillip knew it before I sat down. During those fifteen-minute Monday afternoon chats we became pals.<\/p>\n

He was so perceptually sharp and his compassion palpable; he could be gentle and understanding, comforting and supportive. But there were other ways of being Philip or as he\u2019d say, other self-states. Like it or not, Philip always spoke his mind. Regardless of who was presenting, his clinical acumen was laser like in sharpness and accuracy. Philip was never shy about letting us know when he disagreed with our conceptualizations of clinical material. His strongly held beliefs were part of what drove him to be direct and assertive, but never acerbic. And then again, he\u2019d be observing his impact on us; he was trying to avoid hurting us. And yet again, if anyone of us presented a sound rationale for disagreeing with him, he\u2019d listen respectfully, always keeping an open mind.<\/p>\n

To be sure, working with Philip wasn\u2019t always easy. Becoming aware of what has been dissociated in our patients and in ourselves, especially in the presence of others, can be very jarring. We always left Philip with much to consider.<\/p>\n

In the last few years of his life, as he began to wind down his practice, we could sense a change in Philip. He seemed to slow down somewhat and appear a bit more tired. That\u2019s to be expected when you\u2019re in your late eighties, I guess. None of us wanted to stop working with him or leave him. We respected him and cared deeply about him; we were in it with him all the way. After all Philip at 75 or 80 percent was better than most people at 100 percent.<\/p>\n

I am thankful for the 12 years I shared with my kind, insightful and understanding colleagues and grateful for the chance to have studied with Philip. And I will always treasure my weekly fifteen minutes with my pal, Philip.<\/p>\n

Sheldon Itzkowitz, Ph.D.
\nNew York, NY<\/p>\n

Bromberg, P.M. (2009). Truth, human relatedness, and the analytic process: An Interpersonal\/Relational perspective. International Journal of Psycho-Analysis,<\/em> 90:347-361.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/a>To Philip, with Love<\/h2>\n

Jean Petrucelli<\/strong>, Ph.D. (USA)<\/p>\n

\"Jean<\/a>

Jean Petrucelli with Philip Bromberg at his 2017 tribute<\/p><\/div>\n

Philip was a great man and so much more. He was a man of consequence, with a soaring intellect whose impact on psychoanalysis has been immeasurable. He has touched and influenced many of our lives, including mine, and his words will live on in me. Philip felt things strongly; he could be generous, kind, loving, or curmudgeonly, but everything he felt, he felt with powerful authenticity and conviction.<\/p>\n

It was the summer of 1969 when Philip Bromberg entered the William Alanson White Institute. For over 50 years, he wrote extensively about mental development and the patient\/therapist relationship. His work has both presented and created an interpersonal\/relational point of view that emphasizes self-organization, states of consciousness, dissociation and multiple self-states (at least that’s how Wikipedia describes it). But WE all know that there are countless other ways he has changed the face of psychoanalysis. His books will be classics for centuries, and he has influenced the field in ways that will live on forever.<\/p>\n

Philip influenced my work in so many ways, most notably in my understanding of how the body\u2019s mind speaks its own affective language, and my sense that the more one can listen to it affectively, without trying to think about it, the more fluent the body\u2019s language becomes in communicating what it knows. Philip supported my thinking about bodily experiences as self-states (i.e., body-states). The idea excited him, and his enthusiastic self-state was motivational for me.<\/p>\n

In the spirit of multiplicity and self-states, I also realized in thinking about Philip, that there was “Philip” \u2013 and times when we called him “Philip”– and then there was “Bromberg\u201d — and times when we called him \u201cBromberg.” In our \u201dGang of Four\u201d supervision group of 12 years, what we called him often depended on the self-state he brought \u00a0in that day, and whether we were thinking of him in a playful manner where we could tease him and get away with it. Truth be told, I always did. \u201cPHILIP! Could you say that in English<\/em> please?\u201d Jocularity would ensue, our self-states jesting. \u201c<\/strong>Philip\u201d was the intimate, friendly way of responding to him, and he loved that, even encouraged it. When we were engaging with him in serious analytic terrain, we might refer to him in third person rather than being<\/em> with him. Then he became \u201cBromberg.\u201d The man who would offer up something that could leave us deferentially dumbfounded, wondering in awe, how did he get there? \u201cBromberg\u201d was the academically respectful way of referring to him, and he loved that recognition too. And those who knew him well also knew never to call him Phil. If you were writing his name, don\u2019t forget his middle initial \u201cM\u201d either.<\/p>\n

Of the many gifts Philip gave me I will share one jewel. In 1996, he contributed to a panel discussion of the work of Leo Stone, a classical analyst who in 1961 had written a courageous book, The Psychoanalytic Situation<\/em>, which challenged the classical analytic orthodoxy of the era by arguing that technique must be tailored to the patient. In his discussion, Bromberg wrote:<\/p>\n

My addition is that technique is not something the analyst tailors on his own because he thinks the patient needs it, but an intersubjectively and interpersonally negotiated<\/u> commodity. In other words, what has been added in the past thirty years to Leo Stone’s emphasis on flexibility is the dimension of negotiability<\/u>. <\/em><\/p>\n

So, let’s talk about the jewel of negotiability and Philip. When I first asked Philip if he would consider being honored by the William Alanson White Institute with a dinner at the restaurant Bouley, he said NO! NO! NO! So I knew enough to wait for a while.<\/p>\n

When I raised it to him again, this time showing him the video of former honoree, Ed Levenson, Philip said, \u201cWell ….. that looks lovely, BUT …..\u201d When I added that it was in a test kitchen, he said, “WHO eats in a TEST kitchen??\u201d<\/p>\n

So I waited again.<\/p>\n

And I asked for a third time:<\/p>\n

“Philip, when have I asked you to do something that you haven’t had a great time and experience doing?” He paused and smiled.<\/p>\n

I had him.<\/p>\n

I added, “Trust me” (with a sort-of Yiddishy but mostly Italian emphasis).<\/p>\n

He did, thankfully, and he let me organize the event, which he truly loved.\u00a0 At the dinner, when I told this story as part of a toast, I thanked everyone who attended for not letting me <\/em>down. And I thanked Philip, for all the “techniques” on negotiability<\/u> that he<\/em> had taught me because sometimes a no<\/em> is just a no<\/em>, but sometimes a no<\/em> is really a dissociated yes<\/em>.<\/p>\n

It goes without saying that Philip was renown in our community, but it wasn\u2019t brought home to me how widespread his influence was until I presented at a conference in Seattle. Once the attendees learned of my affiliation with Philip, it was as if I told them I was hanging around George Clooney, or Bono or Beyonc\u00e9 or the Dali Lama. They kept peppering me with questions: What is he like? He’s my hero. Is he approachable? Would he come speak here? Would he eat in a test kitchen? You know, the usual kinds of questions.<\/p>\n

And so, what I walked away with was the idea that even though we may be constantly struggling with ambiguity and uncertainty, there is one thing I can say for sure: Rock Stars come in all different shapes, sizes and ages.<\/p>\n

I will miss you dearly, Philip. I hope you have found some peace, and that somehow you know how many spaces you occupy for all of us, personally and professionally. And I hope you know how much you have helped so many of us tolerate, stand in \u2013 indeed, flourish in — spaces we could not, without you, have even conceived of as possibilities.<\/p>\n

Jean Petrucelli, Ph.D.
\nNew York, NY
\n
\n<\/a>\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

For Philip Bromberg<\/h2>\n

Stuart A. Pizer,<\/strong> Ph.D. (USA)<\/p>\n

Philip Bromberg\u2019s death, on May 18, is a real punctuation point in our psychoanalytic world.\u00a0 And it leaves a hole in our relational world, globally. My loss of Philip is a hole in my own personal world.<\/p>\n

Barbara and I first met Philip (people called him Phil but, over the years, we stayed with calling him Philip) when Steve Mitchell told our MIP (Massachusetts Institute for Psychoanalysis) advanced candidates\u2019 class that he was the best person to come to our theory seminar with Paul Russell and teach us Sullivan. The weekend he spent here conducting a two-day seminar in our living room felt magical. A bit like falling in love. Philip as teacher had an extraordinary ability to focus his listening exquisitely. You could sit there and watch him taking in, with eyes and ears, from the edge of his soul, the plumb lines in each person\u2019s comments. This was not effort but receptiveness, which would lead to his follow up at the heart of an issue. I imagined him listening this way in his office. Philip also looked strikingly like my grandfather.<\/p>\n

We quickly became friends. He stayed at our house several times. We ate in his Central Park West apartment, or went out to dinner at each trip to New York. We own a painting by his wife Margo which, literally, we bought off the wall of their living room. Philip\u2019s attachment to his friends ran deep. And he had, and loved, and mentored many.<\/p>\n

Philip\u2019s exquisite sensitivity was accompanied by notable vulnerability. He could require special handling, a delicacy at the edge of fragility. He was also temperamental. He could turn abruptly to harsh and chilling projections. But he also had the amazing capacity to look deeply inside and discerningly testify to his own internal processes.<\/p>\n

When Barbara and I were founding co-chairs of the MIP Symposium Committee, we invited Philip to speak at a full day Symposium shaped around his work. He wrote his pivotal paper, \u201cStanding in the Spaces: The Multiplicity of Self and the Psychoanalytic Relationship,\u201d for this program, in which he engaged in a heated exchange with Frank Lachmann over how many \u201cselves\u201d our theory needs. Philip also accepted our invitation to speak at the 1998 Festschrift<\/em> for Paul Russell. Charged with reading and using Paul\u2019s paper on \u201crendering the repetition,\u201d Philip wrote \u201cPotholes on the Royal Road: Or Is It an Abyss?\u201d<\/p>\n

Philip would assert that theory, in itself, did not much interest him. He said he did not consider himself a theorist, but a clinician energized by clinical writing. But Philip developed Sullivan\u2019s ideas on dissociation, textured it with Winnicottian object relations, and generated a model of a multiply constituted self, structured by an innate talent for dissociation which became defensively deployed in the face of relational trauma. He crystallized the image of health as the capacity to feel like one self while being many, and conceptualized resistance as the person\u2019s adaptive struggle to maintain self-stability in the destabilizing process of analytic change. He emphasized the relational process, the living together of reciprocal states and state shifts, rather than what he considered the desperate, or \u201ccranky,\u201d recourse of linear or \u201ccontent\u201d interpretation.\u00a0 He declared that what the patient needs in the analyst is a person, not a \u201csaint.\u201d And he defined the essential movement of analytic process as the gradual relinquishment of the dissociative structure of the mind, allowing for experiences of personhood, the recognition of the analyst as a \u201creal\u201d person, and the capacity to hold paradox and multiplicity in conflict. Now, if that is not theory I don\u2019t know what is!<\/p>\n

Long after the sadness of today has softened, psychoanalysis will be remembering, using, and building upon the legacy of Philip Bromberg\u2019s foundational ideas.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Stuart A. Pizer, Ph.D.
\nCambridge, Massachusetts
\n<\/a><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/h2>\n

Corresponding in the Spaces<\/h2>\n

Maggie Robbins<\/strong>, M.P.S., L.P. (USA)<\/p>\n

As a send-off into analytic training, my private practice supervisor gave me Standing in the Spaces<\/em>. I told an English professor friend to take a look; he put a chapter on his advanced seminar syllabus. Somehow Philip discovered the class. He was tickled. How had Max even heard of the book, Philip wondered. Max told him, and he asked Max to put us in touch.<\/p>\n

Why? I can only imagine that being Philip, if there was anything going on concerning Philip Bromberg, he wanted his finger on the pulse of it.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>His next step was to check my<\/em> pulse. Through the medium of email, he ascertained that I was alive enough to bother with, then challenged me to become more so. And as the extra blood poured into my brain, I started to live more thoroughly, using increasingly more of myself.<\/p>\n

After the death of his wife, C. S. Lewis (1961) wrote, with dread, that his memories of her were becoming obscured. Philip (2011) quotes Lewis, characterizing this as a particularly protective dissociation: \u201cSlowly, quietly, like snowflakes . . . little flakes of me . . . are settling down on my image of her. The real shape will be quite hidden in the end. . . .\u00a0 The rough, sharp, cleansing tang of her otherness is gone.\u201d Philip\u2019s tang: despite the ache I want to hold on to it, but how? There\u2019s his writing, yes, plus Lawrence Brown\u2019s author photo for The Shadow of the Tsunami<\/em>, which gives me a jolt I hope I won\u2019t ever get habituated to. But for me even that fierce, joyful picture and all those radiant words don\u2019t capture Philip.<\/p>\n

In I Am a Strange Loop<\/em> (2007), Douglas Hofstadter recalls his reaction to a sudden death, how he desperately piled up anecdotes, journal passages, home movies, photographs. With a large enough accumulation of traces, could he realize a more granular\u2014even a more living\u2014copy of the original? I kept our emails, but I can\u2019t find Philip in them, which makes me so sad. And I expect I will fail if I try to glue together a pointillist collage. But our interactions coaxed a great deal of me out of hiding. I guess my job isn\u2019t to remember. It\u2019s to stay out.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Maggie Robbins, M.P.S., L.P.
\nNew York, NY
\n<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Hofstadter, D. (2007). I Am a Strange Loop<\/em>. New York: Basic Books.<\/p>\n

Lewis, C. S. (1961). A Grief Observed. <\/em>New York: HarperCollins, 1989, pp. 31\u201332, as cited in \u201cPlaying with Boundaries,\u201d collected in Bromberg, P. M. (2011), Awakening the Dreamer: Clinical Journeys. <\/em>New York and London: Routledge, 2011, p. 62.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/h2>\n

My Friend Philip<\/h2>\n

Donnel Stern,<\/strong> Ph.D. (USA)<\/p>\n

Philip was first my teacher, and when I met him in 1976 he was already a mature, creative and sophisticated psychoanalytic thinker and clinician. He seemed beyond my reach. I was young enough that the number of years between him and me carried much more significance than they did later on, as we became close friends. As time passed, Philip recommended me for speaking and writing engagements he could not himself accept. I appreciated these gestures very much, since I was not known. Eventually we referred one another patients, supervisees, and members of our study and supervision groups. During the 80s, at no little risk to himself and his career, he stood by me during a politically difficult episode at the White Institute, very painful to me. He had my back, and thereafter he always did. I grew to love him for it.<\/p>\n

Nobody listened better than Philip did, with that adoring, beaming expression that any friend of his saw over and over again. He was just so very happy for you when you had good news, and ready to absorb whatever was less than good, and perhaps to help you see it a little differently.<\/p>\n

Philip had a sweetness about him. He was vulnerable in a way that was irresistible. He was shy and very private. He never expected to be lionized, and when he was, or when someone sought him out from some distant part of the world (as people constantly did), he never stopped being surprised, and the attention could make him uncomfortable. But despite feeling that way, he was unfailingly gracious to these people, generous with his time, his interest in them, and his attention to them.<\/p>\n

As in any close relationship, we had our share of conflicts, but we always found our way through them. Our affection for one another was such that once, in the midst of a painful fight with him via email, I used the phrase \u201cpartners in thought\u201d to convey some aspect of the point of view I was trying to press on him. Immediately, it occurred to me that I should use it as the book title I was looking for, and I was so pleased and excited that I emailed him back right away, smack in the middle of the disagreement, to express my delight. He was delighted in return, and the skirmish ended.<\/p>\n

Even when we disagreed, I always maintained the confidence that the motive for Philip\u2019s position, to the extent that that motive had to do with me, was to press for what he believed was in my best interest. I might have been convinced that he was dead wrong, but I knew that he was arguing his position because he thought it was best for me.<\/p>\n

For many years we went to dinner at restaurants all over the Upper East Side, where we both had our offices, bouncing around from one eatery to another. I learned to drink a very dry (no vermouth at all!) Grey Goose martini, up, with olives on the side, always on the side. I learned so many things from Philip. That is one of the most enjoyable of them. I will miss our times together, especially those dinners, more than I can express. You can never be prepared for the death of someone you love, no matter how much you may have known it was coming. I knew it was coming. But I am heartbroken, anyway.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Donnel Stern, Ph.D.
\nNew York, NY<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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